SEE YOU NEXT LIFETIME ~ Past Lives and Reincarnation

SEE YOU NEXT LIFETIME ~ Past Lives and Reincarnation

 Aloha MM’s! J  

I always include a past life in my romance stories. Why?  

Because they’re important to me. A writer friend of mine once commented on the ‘paranormal elements’ in my work. I was a wee bit startled. I thought…what paranormal elements? To me, paranormal covers werewolves, shape shifters, vampires and zombies. So I had to stop and think a minute about what he was talking about. I realized he meant the intuitive things my characters use and their past lives that crop up.  

Oh? LOL. To me, they’re everyday, normal things.  

I remember reading Ian Stevenson’s past life accounts as a teenager and it completely resonated with me. Later I went on to read Brian Weiss's excellent work on the subject and used past life regression with people in my own work. Even too this day, I’ll read just about anything on past lives. They fascinate me. Not so much for the ‘hero’ factor, but because they contain so much information that relates to present day. 

Some people scoff and say, “Oh, everyone reckons they were Mary, Queen of Scots.” 

But to honest, I’ve never met anyone who’s ever claimed to be anyone THAT famous. I’ve come across one person who I think WAS someone famous, but more on that in a minute. I found a minor royalty figure in a court. And I met a baker for Marie Antoinette’s household, but that’s about as famous as it gets. People on the whole see fairly ‘ordinary’ lives.  

I’ve had the most excruciatingly boring past lives at times. It makes me wonder if that’s why I can’t STAND to live an ordinary life now. The thought of living an everyday existence with a white picket fence, a minivan and 2.5 children makes me want to slit my wrists.  

Last lifetime, I flew planes in WWII. I wasn’t a bomber or fighter pilot. I was a woman pilot in the ATA. The Air Transport Auxiliary in England. We ferried aircraft all over the British Isles for the RAF and American forces. There were approximately 1300 odd pilots that flew for the ATA. Of those, 166 were women pilots. And until fairly recently, not a very well known fact. They didn’t get a lot of recognition and still, not much has been written about them.  

When I first ran across this lifetime, I didn’t have any information. I’d always been interested in planes. I loved to fly, even back in New Zealand in the sixties when our airlines were relatively new and flying wasn’t an everyday occurrence. I just loved it. I wanted to be a flight attendant growing up. Though, I probably should have been a pilot. But back then in New Zealand, it just didn’t cross my mind that a woman could train and fly an aircraft, especially a ‘big heavy’ as the bigger transport planes are known.  

And nowadays, there are still only about 6% of women who are pilots. The ratio is low. I’m not sure why. I’ve spoken to other pilots and none of us have a good answer. I suspect it’s still not on ‘the list’ of what females want to be when they grow up. You do have to have the ‘spatial awareness’ to fly an aircraft and map reading skills etc, and because of the brain wiring, many women don’t have these abilities. There’s a masculinity to it that possibly doesn’t appeal as well. All the women pilots I know, just about all like fast cars too. LOL. They almost seem to go hand in hand. I’m a fan of the writer Deborah Buell Coonts, who writes a great series out of Vegas. She’s an accomplished pilot and instructor. She’s also a fan of big V8’s like I am. J 

Where did we get this predilection from? What attracted us to planes? Fast cars? Speed?  

Pieces for me have come in at different times in my life. I collected a piece there, a piece here.  

From the age of 5, I lived near the Wigram Airforce Base in Christchurch, New Zealand. We used to be able to go over there to swim in the big pool and occasionally they’d have a movie day for us kids. I loved being on base. I felt completely at home and that’s still a rare thing for me to feel. It makes me feel completely safe and like I belonged. When I later went out with airforce guys, I again felt utterly safe and at home.

When I was a teenager and finding my own style, I dressed in ‘military’ style clothing. I wore pencil slim skirts, just below the knee, court shoes, seamed stockings. I matched it with a tailored belted jacket or blazer, over a dress shirt and tie. I topped these ensembles off with ‘lemon squeezer’ hats and sometimes a pillbox hat. I didn’t realize for a long time that I was emulating the forties wartime style. I just felt comfortable in it. I had all my clothing made in this style. There was a huge wool ‘great coat’ I always wore, and leather gloves. Handbags from that era grab me.  

When I was about 20, I got a cab home one day and said to the taxi driver, “I don’t think anyone’s romantic anymore.” I was fed up with dating and things in general. He was chatty and we connected with each other. He offered to show me a romantic time. He was attractive and just ‘had something,’ so I said yes.

Neil picked me up on Saturday night and drove me over to the bays. We parked in a quiet spot. He had wine and glasses, it was very romantic, but the thing that really dug into my soul was that he also had music. He slipped a Glenn Miller tape into the tape deck and music took me away into another time and place. I wrote it into a story Saint Nicholas coming out in Christmas this year.  

“Romantic enough, for you?” he asked me quietly, with his dark intense Romani eyes. 

Very!   

War time music is so soothing to me. I’m completely at home with it. I went out with Neil for a while. We remained friends over the years, sometimes seeing a lot of each other, sometimes nothing for years. We finally figured out we’d known each other from the French Resistance. He’d been a Frenchman in the movement. 

When I was 21, I got involved in a spiritual group and we used to read for each other. One night, someone saw me standing there in a military uniform. A women’s uniform. They told me I used to fly in WWII in England. I thought they were a bit off, because as far as I knew, women hadn’t flown in the war. But the uniform felt right. I dismissed the flying part though to some degree. Remember too, at that time, there was no internet. You couldn’t go and look it up like you can now. And I was too young and self involved to go to the library and do any research.  

I went out with a guy that I was attracted to—over the phone! It was the most bizarre thing. I just had to be with him. There was no rhyme nor reason to it. He didn’t look like anyone I’d usually be attracted to. But his soul called me to him. When I met him, I loved him instantly.  

As things went along, we found bits and pieces from the past. It used to be terrible when he left to go home, just across the other side of town. I would be utterly bereft. I literally felt like my heart was breaking, that I'd never see him again. It was a ghastly feeling. It wasn’t until we stumbled on the WWII past life with both of us in it, that we understood what was going on.  

He’d been a B-17 pilot with the American Eighth. His name was Rick. And every time they went out, you never knew whether they were coming back. You’d stand and see them coming in, do the plane count. The tension was ghastly. You’d be coaxing in every aircraft. Come on, one more, come on. Please.  

You’d hear a crippled or injured B-17 coming in… 

Praying they were all okay. 

Watching in horror sometimes when they landed, carved up beyond belief. 

Sometimes they didn’t make it… 

Sometimes they never came back. 

Rick disappeared over a bombing mission in Germany. Never made it back. 

Even now, writing about it, provokes the most intense emotions in me. I write Rick’s lifetime in Henry and Isolde. A small piece in Saint Nicholas. It’s my strongest lifetime. I have the most memories from there.  

That was Peter Daly, he was Rick. So, when he went to go home, I was a mess. I really felt I’d never see him again. When we realized it was from that lifetime, it got a wee bit easier. But it was such a visceral intense reaction. But we knew then why I was reacting the way I was.  

Was he a soulmate? No. Was he someone I knew on a soul level? Yes.  

We eventually parted and both moved on.  

But other things would crop up from that lifetime. I went through a time where it seemed that everyone I met was from that lifetime. I’d look at them and think, I know you. Then I’d get the flash of WWII and realize where from. I ran across a lot of people in the French Resistance movement. I had a stint there after flying with the ATA. I think it was after Rick died and I later, died in France.  

When I went to France for the first time, I knew it. I was at home there. That surprised me at the time. I hadn’t been that interested in going to France. But going back there, I felt like I’d come home.   

What was interesting about the French Resistance people, is that often I wouldn’t say anything. Other people would say to me, ‘out of the blue.’ "I know you from WWII, we were in the Resistance together." When I went to the American War Memorial in France, and saw the memorial to the Resistance workers, I burst into tears when I saw one of the photos and names. It was a picture of Violette Szabo, who was captured and tortured. I knew her. My soul remembered her.

I've just realized what I've done too. I've named my character in Saint Nicholas after her, making her Violet. And in The Chi Circle, the second book of the Troika Love Series trilogy, I named Charlie's past life character in France as Etienne. Which is odd, because all the other names have correlations between them, Galena/Elena/Leena etc. But Etienne was always odd and I've often wondered how I came up with that name. I just went to check Violette's spelling of her last name because I couldn't remember it. She was married to Etienne Szabo. There's my answer. And I've just read more on her and realize how I would have gotten to know her through training in the SOE.

Violette Szabo

There are so many things that have come up over time that fit with that lifetime.  

I didn’t learn to fly until my early forties in this lifetime.

I still had my love of my planes, but I’d never trained as a flight attendant.  

I think I was a better pilot last lifetime, than this one. LOL. It wasn’t as second nature as I would have liked. There were things I did that drove my flight instructor and I up the wall.  

This is from The Mystic Manifestor:  

I flew in England during WWII as a woman ferry pilot and some of that had stayed with me. When I kept making the same odd mistakes, or weird things tripped me up, I tapped into my subconscious to see if I could find out why. I had trouble doing a wingover and nearly passed out each time. I went looking for the incident and found it. I’d brought an aircraft in to land and done a wing over, crashing. I wasn't hurt, but it was scary. Once I reset the pattern with NLP, I never had a problem again in present day.  

            I also had this maddening habit of pulling the throttle out the wrong way. My instructor and I kept saying, "Why am I doing that??" It was dangerous. He'd never had a student do it and I was mystified too. 

            I thought, there’s no way, they would have manufactured an aircraft with a reverse throttle. But it was becoming a problem flying. I went and researched it and sure enough...the French had ordered aircraft with this reverse throttles. They and some other European countries had the ‘reverse throttle’ until everyone came into line with the standard positioning now. And we delivered them. :-) Oh. For whatever reason, those aircraft stayed with me. Once, I'd reset it, I never had a problem with it again.

I saw myself in past life regressions flying an Avro. When the therapist asked me what kind of aircraft, I said, “Four engined, it says Arvo.” I could see it in the cockpit. She probed further and said, “It’s a Lanc.” It wasn’t until I did some research later, that I realized it was an Avro Lancaster Bomber. We flew them in the ATA.  

Lancaster Bomber Crew of 7

I’d often automatically reach my hands above me for switches that weren’t there. I remembered dropping out of a forward hatch. All these pieces make up my experience of WWII.  

My love has always been the slow flight of an open cock-pit bi-plane…because I trained in them initially in the thirties. A lot of ‘modern’ pilots find them way too slow. Aaron thought they were slightly frightening. I'm happiest in an open cock-pit, the gentle waft into the air from a grass strip. Heaven. And the sound of a radial engine  starting up, oooh, heavenly, my whole soul vibrates with pleasure when I hear it.  

I was probably in my late twenties before I ran across the information that women DID fly in wartime England as ferry pilots. Good lord, I thought, so it’s true.  

Later, I found out there were American flyers as well, but this relatively obscure piece on women flyers in England during the war was where I’d been.  

I always had trouble with the control pedals and fashioned two squarish cushions into a padding for me, which later I realized where like the parachutes we used to sit on. LOL.  

All these tiny pieces that make up that lifetime for me. But they make up the mosaic of a life I lived there. I was petite and had black wavy/curly hair. I’ve felt myself walking across an airstrip in uniform and a great coat. It’s very here and now, very visceral. Someone once thought my name was Sally Greenway. But I’ve never found that name on the flyers list. So, I’m unsure what that goes with.  

No doubt, one day it will come to light, as other things have done over the years.  

But it’s a strong lifetime for me. There’s too many things from it for me to say, it’s just imagination. And the evidence for past lives is too numerous now anyway. It’s still one of my favorite subjects though. 

And getting back to the one famous person I think I might know about…sort of…LOL. 

I’ve been in various groups over the years. Something compelled me to get a book out of the library on Al Capone one day. I had no idea why at the time. When I flipped through it, I could identify people. I thought, I know you, you. I’d flip through a few more, identify a few more people that were familiar to me in the photos. It was uncanny. When I went back and read about the people, they’d all connected with each other (the ones I’d identified.) I also looked at Dion O’Banion, who was a nemesis of Al Capone and thought, oh god, I know you. I showed it to my spiritual friend Linda and we both agreed it was Greg, her ex from this lifetime. The amount of similarities was uncanny.  

Dion O'Banion

Greg was involved in a project with the ‘Henry’ boys. I say the ‘Henry’ boys, because I went out with either one or both of them and can’t remember who was who. They had VERY strange energy. I cannot tell you to this day, who I went out with. It feels like a cloak was put over me. I’ve never experienced it before. There was Bryan and another brother, who’s name I can’t remember. He and Bryan were both involved with Greg in a project in New Zealand. And when Linda and I looked at it, it correlated to the Capone/Banion Chicago lifetime. The same energy and patterns had emerged. It was a really odd setup. Really peculiar stuff.  

Anyway, in the end, it all fell apart, ‘Bryan’ or one of the Henry’s went to the States to live. We heard he’d gotten himself involved with a Mafia family. Back to his old haunts. We think he was Al Capone. Look, someone HAS to have been Al Capone. And I might have thought we were fantasizing until this happened. Yet there were some eerie things that matched and all the information isn’t there for me now. Lots of real odd ‘evil’ energy with it. I don’t usually get into that ‘evil’ stuff, but this was downright weird.  

Al Capone

So fast forward a few years... 

I ran into Neil (yes, he of the Romantic Romani man days) and we hadn’t seen each other for a few years. Nor did we move in the same circles at all. We’d gone in completely different ways. I think I’d been overseas. We both had spiritual practices, but they didn’t match at all. In short, we had no contact, shared experiences, etc over the years.  

We talked about various things during the day. I went back to his place for coffee and I don’t know how we got onto the subject, but he said, “I know who Al Capone was in this lifetime.”  

I did a double take and said, “Oh, okay, I think I do too. Who’s yours?” 

“A guy called Bryan Henry,” he said.  

My mouth dropped open.  

“Oh my God, that’s who I was going to say.”  

Now, it was his turn to have his mouth drop open.  

We went through all our info and we had no connector points anywhere along the way. There was nothing. We’d both gotten this info from completely independent different sources.  

So, that’s my one famous person, but like I said…I can’t actually remember him. I went out with him several times too. And he was interesting, charismatic. I remember that. But I still can’t tell you which brother was which. I don’t know which one I went out with at which time. I can’t tell you what they looked like. Dark, tall, handsome... It was like a veil had been thrown over me. It was really odd.  

When I told Neil about this, he said, yes, stay away from them if you ever run across them again. They’re really bad news. My experience of not knowing which brother I’d gone out with and odd details missing, was also other people’s experiences with the Henry brothers. One brother was nicer than the other. But the one that slipped back into the Mafia family here in the States was the baddie. Al Capone, still up to his old tricks.  

So, until we meet again… 

Have a mystically manifesting week. Thanks and aloha Meg J

The F Word ~ Feelings, flow, freedom!

 

The F Word ~ Feelings, flow, freedom!

 

Aloha everyone! How are we FEELING this week? What I’ve been working on for a few weeks now are feelings and well…feeling them. Letting myself be vulnerable and open. Leaning into them, instead of away from them.  

 

There’s a scene in Top Gun, where Maverick is going to get closer to another plane. His REO says, “You’re going to do WHAT!”
 

“I’m going to bring them in a little closer. I’ll hit the brakes and they’ll fly right by.”  

 

His REO just about has a breakdown. But Maverick does just that, pulls off the maneuver and get them away from danger.  

 

 

By ‘leaning into’ the situation, he got out of it faster and in better shape, than if he’d kept trying to dodge and weave the other fighter jet, intent on gunning him down.

So, it is with our feelings and flow.  

 

Martha Beck, talks about this condensing of emotions in regards to grief. She noticed at someone’s funeral that a Down Syndrome boy she was looking after would break down into intense grief every so often. She observed he only managed to “sustain” this level for about a minute and a half. Then he was done and settled down again. 

 

This is the same phenomena when something’s causing panic or worry. By ‘leaning into’ it, you move through it faster and smoother. 

 

 

 

Think about a motorcycle racer. Have you seen how low those guys go on their bikes into the corners? My God! But if they don’t, they risk doing themselves a terrible injury. If they hesitate or try to sit up too soon, they’ll unbalance the bike and come a real cropper. By leaning into the corner, they actually keep themselves and bike in balance, while keeping their speed up.

It’s the same for us with any emotions we’re “trying NOT to feel.” We’re actually pulling ourselves off balance.

When I used to live in Singapore, I was friends with an American guy who rode a Triumph motorcycle. He loved riding with me, because I was used to motorcycles, my dad had several. And most of the young guys in New Zealand had owned one at some point. Cheap transportation. So I knew to lean into the corners with him as a pillion passenger and we’d be safe. The young Asian girls he took on the back often didn’t know this. They’d try to sit rigidly upright, nearly causing him and the bike to go out of control.

 

 

And so it is with something that’s frightening us or niggling away.

Let’s say, you’re worried about where the money will come for something. It’s a big concern and you’ve been “trying” to “just stay positive.” But sometimes the fear just grips you in its vice like talons anyway. Lean into it.

Allow yourself to just “go there.” Imagine the worst, feel the whole range of fear, bawl your eyes out, scream and rant, let the fear seep in, the panic, the worry.

What you’ll find it that rather than getting stuck in it, a curious thing happens.

And I only know this, because I’ve been in situations where things looked grim and this was the one thing that brought things into balance again.

You think you’ll keep going down, but some internal survival mechanism clicks in. For about a minute and a half or even a few minutes, we’ll feel ghastly. Then slowly, but surely, once the built up feelings have been purged, we get the turnaround in our feelings.

What I found interesting, having done this a few times—and it’s never easy, is that you naturally want to resist it, like leaning right into a corner on a bike. It feels slightly unnatural and like you’ll can off, tearing yourself to shreds and decapitating yourself.

But you actually go through the feelings faster and you’re much more in balance. Slowly the fear bleeds off. You get moments of feeling it will okay, it’s going to be alright, something will turn up, things are going to work out. You can feel it internally in your body, as it relaxes, and the fears recede. You’ve actually pulled yourself back into alignment by feeling all the ghastly, icky, horrible, terrifying feelings.

 

 

It’s not nice to do. I agree.

However, it’s a wee bit like getting a splinter in your skin. You have a choice. You can leave it in there and every time you bump it or move the wrong way, it stings and hurts. Or you can get a needle and tweezers and dig it out. Yes, that’s painful too, but you only get a few minutes of pain, compared to hours of it, if you leave the splinter in there.

This is one of the fastest ways to move through something that’s frightening you and back into a balanced space. It will make your projected energy out into the world more positive. You’ve actually then got more chance of attracting in what you want.

It keeps us in our flow and on track.

The other thing I’ve been trying to do is gauge my feelings, and then go with them. Rather than fighting them.

I’m busy working on several books at the moment, blogs, websites, fb, Twitter, emails, arghhhh… so my ‘to do’ list, is usually overly long and slightly crazy.

I kept getting overloaded with it and didn’t seem to be getting as much done as I needed. I’d often start my night with my list and inwardly groan. There were usually things on there I wanted to do and things that produced an ‘ugh’ feeling.

Generally what I’d been doing was attacking the things I ‘thought’ needed doing first. Then I’d get to the ‘fun’ stuff I felt good about. I always got to the end of the night with only half of it done.

Then a couple of days, I said, stuff it, I’m going to go with what I feel like doing now and bugger the rest. I’d probe out in my feelings to see what felt good to do and I’d just ignore the other stuff my head said needed to be done, now, Now, NOW!

I actually got more done.

Even the ‘sloggy’ stuff I got through faster. By doing the stuff that made me feel better first, or what I got a feeling for, I seemed to end up with more time and energy. And this is always the way. It’s again, that ‘leaning into’ the feeling of something. And going with that, you move through it faster and come out cleaner in your energy. All sorts of things start flowing.

I’ve been writing a new Christmas story that goes with my Troika Love Series trilogy, coming out next year. Two of the main characters are Romani or Russian gypsies—Ruska Roma. I’d put a lot of things in my story, writing from pure instinct and what felt right. I hadn’t done a lot of research on them, just general things. I’ve always been deeply fascinated by Roma and felt a connection to them, but still hadn’t read a great deal on them.

 

 

Last night, despite other things on my pile, I had a feeling I really wanted to do the research for Soul Songs and see what I could dig up. I just ‘happened’ to find this amazing website on the Roma with a terrific amount of info. As I read through it, I was constantly astounded at the information in there that matched with my story, I’d already written. I wrote in one part that Alex sees the same look in Nikita’s eyes, as if someone was hurting an animal. Nikita is a Roma who works with horses. Last night, I read that this is actually a definite thing in the Roma culture. Never hurt an animal. Roma’s view this as almost culturally offensive.

Nikita makes Alex a fine silver bracelet. I also read that the Roma are particularly skilled in the metalwork and jewelry trade. I didn’t know this.

The list goes on.

 

 

And this is what happens for us in all sorts of circumstances and things when we connect with our own feelings and move back into our flow. All sorts of things start turning up for us, without a lot of effort and elbow grease. Things start plopping into our laps. Thank you, Universe!

 

 

The Keeper of the Peppy Pineapple and Other Feelings.

         The Keeper of the Peppy Pineapple and Other Feelings.  

Aloha everyone!  

It’s been quite a week for me in a GOOD way. Since I have been back editing The Mystic Manifestor for e-book release, I’ve been moving back into the thing I know works—being connected to my feelings.  

Every time I do that, and connect back in with what my heart and soul want, things move into the flow again for me.  

In the last forty-eight hours, I’ve received wonderful news that Muse It Up Publishing, will publish two more of my sensual romance stories. One a Christmas story Saint Nicholas. Also the first of my Troika Love Series Trilogy – Henry and Isolde.  

I was really happy when they picked up my Christmas story, but when I got the email to say I’d been picked up for the first novel in my Troika Love Series, I was literally stunned. Completely lost for words. This incredible feeling that they were going to publish Henry and Isolde!! I was speechless for about half an hour. The wonder of it! What a feeling!!!  

And this is what it’s all about. 

Feelings ~ The F word.  

 

 

They’re our most important barometer for just about anything we do in life. Without them, we’re sunk. We’re a huge ocean liner, dangerously adrift, without a rudder. We might look like we’re in control, but we’re not.  

The more we can feel and let ourselves be vulnerable, the closer we are to our heart energy. And that’s our manifesting center. Without that, we’re still floating, but we’re in the doldrums, no breeze, nothing stirring, the air leaden and heavy…  

Logging into our feelings, obviously comes in a million different forms and ways.  

On another blog this week, I wrote about vulnerabilities. They appeal to us because we’re all fragile and tender on some level. But most of us don’t like exposing those vulnerabilities to the world ad hoc.  

Ask most writers about having a book picked up for publication. Do we cheer less the more books we get published? Do we get blasé? “Oh, another one, goodo!”  

 

No. Most of us, no matter how often we’ve been published, heave out a massive sign of relief. Then squeeze ourselves silly and do the ‘Peppy Pineapple.’ This is the appropriate reaction to good news things while also muttering things to ourselves, like:  

‘YES!!! Hot damn!! They picked up Nicky!!! Yes (okay, so as not to bore you—that word gets repeated a lot!) Then I start the dance… Cha, cha, cha, cha, cha CHA!!! I fling a hip out and my big stray puss Mr. Beaumont looks at me like, “Good lord, I wonder if I should go and get Auntie Corinne from downstairs.”  

 

Hot Pineapple Salsa....er...yes. Use your imagination! LOL

 

 

That was for Nicky, (Saint Nicholas) my Christmas story. By the time the acceptance for Henry and Isolde, came in, I was even beyond the Carmen Miranda salsa. I was at the stunned mullet stage. But a very, very happy stunned mullet. J  

The point is, we all have vulnerabilities, no matter how old, experienced, wise etc we are. It goes with the territory of donning the ‘human being,’ costume. Every book a writer writes and submits, waiting to see if it gets picked up is a nervy experience, no matter how many we’ve had published. What if THIS book’s the one that’s a flub? What if the other twenty I’ve written have just been mere channeled flukes and now the real me is coming out, it sucks!  

Very few of us can be utterly blasé about things like this and we shouldn’t be. Do you think when the ten millionth (probably quite literally) cool thing happens to Richard Branson, he says…nice.  

Hell no. I bet he breaks into the biggest grin and celebrates!  

That exuberance is because he’s hooked into his feelings. How many decisions do you think he’s made from his head? Not that many. He’s got a unique way of doing business, but he’s not alone out there in the world of people who are realizing their gut, intuition and essentially their feelings or heart are the best guide money can buy.  

And the best bit is: they’re free. You own them. They’re yours.  

So use them.  

The good feelings are easy to do for most people. But what about when we get something that’s maybe a wee bit on the icky side? What then?  

When I talked to my mentor today, someone he knew had something fabulous happen for them. He was happy, but also his response seemed slightly lackluster. When we talked about it bit more, deep down, his concern was they’d become rich and famous and leave him. It tainted the joy he should’ve felt for his friend and came across as unenthusiastic.  He was scared on an internal level for himself. And was also feeling guilty and bad he felt that way.  

We all get hit with these vulnerabilities at different times. The trick is to admit them. I’m happy for you, but I’m scared you’ll go off and be famous then won’t want me anymore. When you can admit what you’re feeling, it takes the power out of something. We talked it through and he was a lot better afterward.

I liked that he could open up to me and admit that because he’s an older male.  

I choose to write about the ‘new’ metro men out there. The men, who express themselves, feel their emotions and tell us what they’re feeling. They’re becoming an increasing sector of males that women find 
immensely appealing. Another group I’m in talked about the increase in male/male love stories and the women readership that’s gobbling them up. As Helena Fairfax puts it, "They're on the rise and rise." Why? Another person surmised that women are attracted to the ‘feminized man.’ Not an effeminate man, but an emotionally developed and intelligent, humanized man.  

Whole humans not half people.  

 

Men that don't cry frighten me. When a man is able to be soft and gentle, and expressive, he instantly becomes much more masculine to me. What a dichotomy. But it’s that humanness and depth of feelings again that people gravitate toward.  

How often do we openly admire people who express themselves in some way, whether it’s verbally, through art, music, performing etc. Why? Because they tap into a part of energy that gives us something good.  

My current aim is to be all of who I can be. And that doesn’t mean, being the best writer, movie producer, friend etc.  

It means, being all of ME. All the hidden vulnerable parts of myself. Admitting truths. Facing up to fears and being okay about it.  

In Chi, Henry’s conflicted and feeling slightly awful. On the one hand, he feels bad Charlie and Mea didn’t work out, because he wants Charlie to be loved and love. On the other hand, he’s also secretly relieved Charlie won’t be seeing Mea any more, because he hated him being away from home. That’s real. And it’s okay.  

The more open we can be, the more honest we are to ourselves about how we’re feeling, the more we’re open to what’s going on around us in the world too. It’s a lot easier to manifest anything when you’re in that place.  

So good or bad, keep it real, do the feelings. If you can’t say them out loud, get out a yellow legal pad and scrawl them out until you’re done. When I talked to my mentor, his reaction reminded me that being real is what it’s about.  

 

 

Otherwise how can you celebrate the peppy pineapple when a truckload of them arrive? And they will, if you’re connected and listening to your own feelings on everything. Staying switched on and tuned in.  

Have a dancing pineapple on me! Cha cha cha cha cha CHA!!!